Hello! well, as my title says it Rest In Peace Grandmother. I am still shock that she is even gone. I still can not accept the fact that she passed away. I still do certain things that I would normally do for her, I guess I am avoiding the fact that she is actually DEAD. Yesterday, I served a cup of water for her and put it in her side table right by the bed. I am not fond of funerals or hospitals and having to go to one for hers is like OMG. It really is happening and fast. What can one say to their mother that the are sorry and to be strong when one can’t even face the fact that yes, abuelita is not coming back ever again? I have no words to explain how I feel at the moment. This is a sudden and painful lost for my whole family. Dealing with her death, viweing, & funeral is just to much but I have to keep a strong and neutral face around everyone. even though inside I am not comftorable and in so much pain emotionally. I saw my grandmothers face when we where doing CPR on her and OMG, I wanted to just to shake her and tell her respond, respond, which she did but I just am all “ARGH!!!!!”. I’m just happy knowing the fact that her last day alive she spent it well and with more joy then she had. She even said she wanted to go out more and eat more like that day. Because she felt like she was getting strength and energy for more. Do not quote me on those words. since, my mother knows perfectly more then I do. I can barely say or do anything. I just hope that she is in Heaven and enjoying her new life with her husband, children, & family members. XD I will Love her and miss her very much. I’ll never forget her and I’ll make sure no one in my family ever does.
-Lissette